By Namini Wijedasa
It was a heck of a week for the People’s Alliance. In fact, the entire opposition had a generally decent time of it.

For one thing, there was that bash in Nugegoda on Tuesday which drew an okay sort of crowd. Cobbled together by the Janatha Vimukthi Peramuna, Sri Lanka Freedom Party, Mahajana Eksath Peramuna and National Unity Alliance, the rally gave opposition bigwigs a good chance to bellow on a stage.

Anura Bandaranaike (you remember, the newly appointed presidential adviser on national integration) was in his element. His speeches are tremendously entertaining, as opposed to some of the lame political soliloquies one has to suffer these days. Plenty of punch, lot of linguistic variety and the right dash of mud.

On this occasion, Mr. B made a bee-line for Fowzie — who, for some mysterious reason, seems to have aggravated the better part of Mr. Bandaranaike’s gall bladder. The latter vociferated that Fowzie was likely to get the sack in the near future from the SLFP leadership. His days in the SLFP were numbered, he declared, because Fowzie was a no-good turncoat. Ooooh, and the kettle sure is black, said the pot.

Now nobody’s saying Bandaranaike looks like a pot. Certainly not. But for a man who has swapped parties as often as he has, Mr. B’s grounds for implying the fifth columnist in someone else are rather thin, wot say?

Fowzie seems to be taking it with his good spirits intact. Mr. Bandaranaike doesn’t know the value of Fowzie, he proclaimed. His mother did. In fact, she wanted five Fowzies to develop the country. FIVE, no less. What does Mr. B know? Hmph.

Meanwhile, Fowzie and his other out-of-favour twin (Richard Pathirana) haven’t yet replied to letters sent by SLFP big chief Chandrika Kumaratunga. She has asked the pair to explain what they meant by sauntering about trumpeting the cause of a national government with the UNP. They maintained last week that they had done nothing wrong. The story now is that some party seniors are fighting their cause. Among them is PA general secretary D. M. Jayaratne. Seems the SLFP can’t afford to lose any more of their men... particularly the ones who stick around.

Presidential spokesman Harim Peiris held a press conference midweek. He focused on several issues but much time was devoted to those 49 vehicles which CBK had imported. Journalists were rewarded to some video footage of some jeeps and pajeros — to prove their existence, you know. And the Prime Minister was subsequently invited, cordially, to visit President’s House and inspect them for himself. The President was also perturbed as to why he hadn’t done so already, given his preoccupation with the subject.

The government does seem hinged on those vehicles. Why? Hell, one has to grab a good thing when it comes up... a good thing to divert public attention, that is.

S. B. Dissanayake last week became latest to join the bandwagon of ministers dedicating their time to publicising vehicle issue. He accused the president of spending Rs. 2.4 billion on luxury vehicles without cabinet or parliamentary approval. Obviously bored without a good conspiracy to sink his teeth into, Dissanayake challenged her to appear before a court of law in order to prove her innocence.

The PA reacted strongly. Mangala Samaraweera asserted that the government should concentrate on getting the economy in order without "using monkeys who cough on payment" to snivel on their behalf. Ouch.

Samaraweera was speaking at a press conference organised by Sarath Amunugama, the PA spokesman. The briefing was held near Sravasti, at the office which was earlier used by the United National Party. Journalists gathered in a hall, sitting on maroon plastic chairs placed on a conspicuous green carpet left behind by the UNP. The PA tried to save face by covering their head table with a blue cloth.

The briefing focused on the economy, cost of living and recent Muslim-Tamil clashes in the east. NUA leader Ferial Ashraff was present along with NUA parliamentarian M.L.A.M. Hisbullah. Ashraff spoke the most sense, one must concede. She called for a revision of the cease-fire deal, emphasising that a failure to do so would jeopardise the future of Muslims and Sinhalese in the east. She pointed out that the agreement had made eastern Muslims a group without voice or legitimacy and warned that Muslim youth feel they need to be armed to be heard. More importantly, she stuck to the point (a concept alien to most politicians addressing press conferences in this country).

Amunugama and Samaraweera, for instance, dedicated much time trying to prove that the PA had not ruined the economy — that the government had done that by itself after assuming power in December. This is some feat the PA is giving the United National Front credit for.

Amunugama and Samaraweera would have us believe, therefore, that the PA had gifted the UNF a vibrant and surging economy which the latter promptly proceeded to ruin (wilfully) in a short space of six months. They also want us to accept that the PA were exceptional economic managers who had the people’s best interests at heart (particularly in importing luxury jeeps, pajeros and cars) and that the Treasury had been brimming six months ago. What was that saying, again? You can fool all the people...

Returning to the Muslim problem, there seems to be a competition to determine who heads that particularly community. That’s all very fine but...er...any specific reason why all aspiring Muslim leaders are flocking to the LTTE leadership to get a stamp of legitimacy?

The Sri Lanka Muslim Congress’ Rauff Hakeem started the trend by travelling to the Wanni, wooing the LTTE for recognition as the sole representative of the Muslims, then signing an agreement with them — a deal which did precious little to guarantee protection to eastern Muslims.

Subsequently, the UNF’s M.H. Mohammed tramps to the Wanni and talks with LTTE eastern province leader Karikalan in an effort to guarantee protection to eastern Muslims. Karikalan reportedly declared on this occasion that the SLMC was not the representative of the Muslim people and that the LTTE must deliberate with other leaders.

And we thought that the Muslims decided who their leader was. Heh! What gave us that idea?